Day 23

$_12

I’ve spent most of today staring at my computer screen, trying not to bash my head against it repeatedly.

The only thing worse than writer’s block is editing block.

I went for a head-clearing walk and found the most gorgeous navy blue silk square with white polka dots in my favourite local vintage dress agency, The Wardrobe. My favourite navy scarf is falling to bits, so this will be my new hero accessory.

Mel, the lovely proprietor, gave me a generous donation for the Save Ecclesbourne Glen campaign.

For the past five years I have been nagging my Australian-passported husband, who lives in the UK on a ‘right to remain’ visa, to go for his citizenship.

If the ghastly UKIP get as many seats at the general election next year as people are starting to fear, the immigration laws could change terrifyingly. I don’t want him to be transported.

He has to do a Life in the UK test to make sure he knows when Bonfire Night is and what year the Magna Carta was signed and he’s had a weird mental block about it.

On Sunday afternoon I downloaded an app of practice tests. He immediately became addicted and clocked his first 100% by 2pm the next day.

He’s now sitting next door obsessively going through a whole book of trial tests. So far he’s scored sixteen 100% scores out of seventeen tests.

This is why I call him Mr All or Nothing.

He has a new work contract so I now have to take our daughter to her Tuesday night gym training which used to be his job.

To pass the hour and a half (not long enough to go home, too long to sit and wait…) I went to Sainsburys and read Private Eye standing up.

Craig Brown’s satire of Oprah Winfrey made me cry laughing. ‘This I know to be true.’

The shop was deserted like a scene from a zombie movie, just before the zombies get there, and I was wearing leather-soled shoes, so it was perfect trolley slide conditions.

That’s where you get up speed with a little run and then let the trolley pull you along the aisle.

I hope someone was watching the CCTV.

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3 thoughts on “Day 23

  1. Well, this made me laugh! I love being naughty with a trolley.

    My English husband has been here 28 years and occasionally mutters about becoming an Australian citizen. He likes the idea of getting a free native tree (very Monty Python). But he loathes the major political parties here even more than I do, so cringes at taking on voting responsibilities (!).

    Your lovely spotty square makes me think of my Dad. A couple of years ago I found his cream and navy spotted heavy silk scarf, carefully tucked away. Mum had told me it was from his travels in Asia in the early 50s: he was a clown and juggler in “The Great Virgil’s Magic Show” . I kid you not.

    And finally – Private Eye…my favourite read in 1985. Best cover was “Red Sky at Night, Brixton’s Alight”. You had to be there…

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  2. I added you to my blog roll and love this new blog sick. Target Misosni debuted today- people were buying trolley loads full. And spookily, I am wearing a navy dress with white spots to the Coalface tomorrow. WHAT ARE THE ODDS??? x

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    • Dearest Fu, you are such a MATE and such a ray of positivity sunshine. You are already sending me readers. It was crazy to start a new blog when I had loads of followers on the other one, I need to get someone cleverer with WordPress than me to integrate them, but I’ll think about that tomorrow, fiddle dee dee. I think Tarjay are so clever with their link ups. Is that the Aussie one, or the US one? They’re different aren’t they? xxx

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